Lets talk about masking at work
Imagine floating into the office every morning, slipping on your mask before you even hang up your coat. Not a Halloween mask (though that might be fun), but an invisible one—the one that hides your true self, your quirks, your magic. If you’ve ever felt like you need to be someone else to fit into the workplace, you are masking at work, and you’re certainly not alone.
My MSc research on employee engagement showed that 100% of workers in a large financial organisation are masking their true selves and only bringing between 20 and 70% of their authenticity to work!
This phenomenon is called masking, and while it might seem like a survival skill, it’s actually holding you back from sparkling as brightly as you deserve. Let’s dive into what masking is, why it’s not fabulous for you, and how to let your true self sparkle in every part of your life.
What is masking at work?
Masking at work is where you hide or suppress your natural behaviours, traits, or emotions to fit in, meet expectations, or avoid judgment. It’s a coping mechanism often used by neurodivergent people, like those with ADHD, autism, or anxiety. But let’s be honest, anyone can end up masking when they feel like they don’t quite belong.
At work, masking might look like:
- Pretending to be super organized when really you’re juggling tasks like a circus performer.
- Suppressing your natural energy and sitting still in meetings, even though you’re dying to doodle or fidget.
- Hiding overwhelm when the office noise feels like a rock concert in your brain.
- Feeling like it’s only a matter of time before you make a mistake or get found out
- Worrying that no one likes you or that you’re not good enough
Sure, masking can help you blend in, but it’s totally exhausting. It’s like trying to exercise while wrapped in a heavy, damp blanket. The result? You’re left feeling drained, frustrated, and disconnected from who you really are.
Why masking isn’t good for you.
It Drains Your Energy– Imagine running a marathon every day while wearing a costume. That’s what masking feels like. All that effort to suppress your true self leaves you utterly wiped out. And let’s face it, your energy is too precious to waste on pretending.
It Hides Your Amazingness – When you’re masking, you’re dimming your unique self. You might think you’re just “fitting in,” but the world is missing out on your fabulousness—your creativity, your ideas, your authentic self. And believe me, the workplace needs your sparkle.
It Leads to Burnout – Masking is one of the fastest ways to burnout. That constant effort to “get it right” and appear “normal” can leave you physically, emotionally, and mentally exhausted. And if you’ve ever hit burnout (hello, me three times!), you know it’s not a trip to the spa.
It Hurts Your Self-Esteem – When you mask, you’re sending yourself a message: “Who I really am isn’t good enough.” Over time, that kind of self-talk can deeply dim your confidence and make you question your worth. Spoiler alert: You ARE good enough, exactly as you are.
How masking can show up in the workplace.
Let’s meet Sarah. She’s a fabulous mid-level manager with a to-do list longer than her arm. Sarah has ADHD but hasn’t told anyone at work. Why? Because she’s worried her colleagues might judge her. So, she masks.
During meetings: Sarah forces herself to sit still, even though moving helps her think. She scribbles notes obsessively, not because she’ll read them later, but to look focused.
With deadlines: She stays late at the office, double-checking everything because she worries her impulsivity might have caused mistakes.
In conversations: Sarah rehearses small talk in her head to make sure she’s saying the “right” things.
What Sarah doesn’t realize is that masking is slowly chipping away at her energy, her confidence, and her happiness. She feels like a shell of herself, even though everyone else thinks she’s “doing great.”
Does this sound familiar? If so, it’s time to drop the mask and let your authentic self shine.
How to stop masking and start sparkiling instead.
Get Curious About Yourself – Awareness is the first step to change. Start noticing when and why you’re masking. Are you suppressing your energy in meetings? Over-preparing for tasks? Once you see the patterns, you can start to challenge them.
Embrace Your Quirks – Your quirks are part of your charm! If you’re someone who thinks best while pacing, own it. If you’re more productive with music in your ears, go for it. Your differences are your superpower, not something to hide. I always remove my shoes when in the office or out training with my clients. It’s what I need to do so I can give my very best.
Ask for Accommodations– Workplace accommodations aren’t just for other people—they’re for you, too. Whether it’s noise-cancelling headphones, flexible hours, or a standing desk, small changes can make a big difference.
Find Support – Surround yourself with people who get you. That might mean connecting with a coach (hello!), joining a support group, or simply talking to a trusted friend. You’re not in this alone.
Practice Self-Compassion – Let’s be real: Dropping the mask can feel scary. Be kind to yourself as you navigate this journey. Celebrate the small wins, and remember, progress is more important than perfection.
Lets GLOW together
If you’ve been masking at work, it’s time to take a deep breath and remind yourself that you are enough. The workplace doesn’t need a watered-down version of you; it needs your sparkle, your shine, your full, fabulous self.
As a mindset and neuro-coach, I’m here to help you ditch the mask and step into your authentic glow. Together, we’ll create strategies to embrace your unique brilliance, tackle challenges with confidence, and light up every room you walk into.
Because when you stop masking and start showing up as YOU, the world gets brighter—and so do you.
Are you ready to stop hiding and start sparkling? Let’s chat and make it happen. Your glow-up starts now!
Email me on jeff@elitebreakthrough.co.uk or DM me today 😊